Today has been an exceptionally tough day. Yesterday seemed full of excitement, focusing on how he is doing so well. Better than maybe expected in many ways. Today there were some minor setbacks. Nothing huge, but I feel so vulnerable that any bit of news that doesn't indicate that he is doing amazing makes me crumble to pieces.
One of the biggest things that I have figured out today is how hard it is going to be to learn to cope with this all. For an unknown period of time we'll be going home and leaving our little guy here. When I sleep I will be far away from him. I won't be able to go up to his beside in the middle of the night unless I want to hop a bus first.
I know that the tremendous love and support of our family and friends will be key for getting through this hard time. But please realize that it can also be overwhelming. Right now I feel like I have so much to cope with that I cannot bear to manage one more thing. So if I don't respond to phone calls or emails, please do not worry, do not panic and call more often. Just know that I need to hunker down a little and shelter myself. Sometimes I will need the space to cope with this in private. If there is anything significant to report, we will keep our parents updated, and try to post updates on the blog. If you are curious, please feel free to check the blog regularly.
Until then, we are so grateful for all the love and support. Please feel free to continue to send emails and Facebook messages, but please know that while we will gratefully receive them and they give me a wonderful smile to read, I have to free myself from a sense of obligation to respond to them all. Because you all are amazing people, I know you will understand.
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